what do i need to do to make my heart happy? …


my heart is not happy when it feels “still”
although it is never still
there is no awareness of it
no recognition of its existence
nothing moving it

to make me feel

just the continuous flow of blood
but nothing to stimulate and make this all worth it
yet it beats..
i love and appreciation the feelings that come from my persistent beating heart

persistent

regardless if i acknowledge it..

 

Gratitude is the answer.

 

ask yourself – g.c.

 

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less problem solving, more soul searching

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cling onto the night

for when day comes you must see and face everything

the secrets kept

problems created

at night it is safe for them to be forgotten

our problems tucked safely in our back pockets

guide us through the day

lost without them

incapable of knowing a bright day

without  problems for shade

a world without worry

isn’t even conceivable

if we did ever know such a thing

then we might remember we don’t know anything

nothing is certain

our problems

our world

are not as big as we thought they were

believing that no matter what we try

the life we fantasize will never be tangible

creating problem after problem

attempting to fix something that doesn’t need to be fixed

trying to understand something that doesn’t need to be understood

seeking solutions

to peacefully come to a resolution

we have been trying to fix, understand, change perfection

a rhythmic flowing universe

where change is the only constant

creating problems to give reason to our existence

unaccepting to what is

craving explanation

readily we go blind

denying the truth

that we aren’t as big as we thought we are

neither are our problems

we are far beyond what the mind can conceive

look at the palm of your hand and feel there is nothing more real than you and i

far beyond a body or a mind

and far beyond the problems we constantly seek

 – g.c.

 

nothing to separate the night from the day

i never tire

always awake

an energy

excited for life

time isn’t there

i don’t age

i grow

i learn

i live

i am a soul thriving

i see

my perception draws what surrounds me

it draws stars and universes in passing eyes

i speak

from my soul

i will not allow my intuition, my voice, my answers to be shut down

so ideals and lies can speak

my perspective will remain positive

as my life grows and I change

 

the truth isn’t harsh, if you have the right mindset – g.c.

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the wind sweeps over you
taking your worries with you
whispering to you
that your troubles have no reason to remain
the sun kisses your skin
healing all that is within
the high you feel
just to breathe in something so real
so authentic
nothing can replace it
the joy of being
all that i am seeing
is being
stillness
movement
life
the quiet and simple noises
take away the shouting voices
until responsibility calls me away
the beauty leaves me with nothing to say
just asking me to lie with it all day
be apart of the universe
there is nothing worse
than to get caught up in the cycle of doing
forgetting the beauty of the moment
but here in this place
happiness is not far from your reach
lying here so long the sun has turned me peach
it feels as if i’ll never leave
but when I do
an inner peace will be taken too
and for the last time I watch the trees sway
i cannot stay
so i go inside
something has changed
my soul can no longer hide

outside – g.c.

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starman,

where did you go?

i am here

right now

far from the truth

hope you’ll inspire me

be the proof of everlasting youth

teach me the language of music

i promise i won’t lose it

my mind won’t blow

it’s impermeable to their products of destruction

their nuclear war brought upon us by corruption

in this world it might be best for me to cover my eyes

become illusively deaf and blind

hearing and vision are the things that hide you and i

i feel each energy and vibration enveloped in one star nation

it can be big and loud

or lie calm and proud

every creature

every feature

it is i

and i it

the center of each universe

infinitely cosmically diverse

dissected in to many views

like David Bowie’s eyes

they’re the ultimate muse

look into them to dilute the confusion

they’re two universes in fusion

the power of the stars

it’s yours

it’s ours

lose or choose

both expressed in classic rock and soulful blues

David Bowie inspired – g.c.

 

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these things

thoughts

they are some poor soul’s reality

just the thought

turns your body cold

and makes your soul weep

you know it is not necessary

you know it is because of another

who thought they deserved control

control over others

control over the world

as if the universe were their very own creation

their’s to own

so they own its people, land, and everything in between,

but it’s not theirs’

it’s ours

so wipe the tears

because to them

that just confirms our fears

now

rise

do not rest

until every human can live blessed

 

cry for the world then rise for it – g.c.

*Answers Own Question*

Why Do I Exist? (questions we ask ourselves at 2 in the morning)…

You exist, because there is no universe without you; there is no other you that can share the same view or even the same universe, not with their eyes.

You are a mind that gives matter; there is matter to your mind. You give and are being. The universe’s being is held up in your disguise. You are being, because you can’t not be. You can change, but something will always exist. There is no point in running away from life.

Your being is meant here. It is not by coincidence, the places you appear. Purpose. Feel it. Cherish your purpose. Let it grow. Be and follow your purpose as you are right now. Nurture purpose and your existence. Purpose is your nature. Your nature is in strength, muster this strength, this purpose.

The Center of the Universe

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this past weekend,

i went to the city.

i went to the city and it stole my heart,

right after it made my soul dance.

it left me with a light in my eyes and new desires.

it left me inspired.

it was the energy boost I needed,

for my mind was restless and I had grown tired.

It is kind of odd I say the city was an energy boost. Actually, going out and walking around everywhere gave me extreme fatigue. I did not sleep much while I was there, either. There was too much to do (And, I mean, also, it is the city that never sleeps).

The one uber driver I had, had a great way of explaining the city. He used a radio tower as an analogy for the city. He basically said, it transmits all the energy out into the world. It is the center of all the energy. It is the center of the universe, as some like to call it, and what happens there is signaled out to the rest of the world and has a ripple effect. I thought it was an interesting way to think of it. I can somewhat agree with this analogy. You go there, and when leave, you take this exuberance with you.

Being in the city, reminded me I have a purpose. It reminded me that I am not anyone else and I never will be. It reminded me of the beauty of the fact that we are all so similar, yet so different. We all have our own passions and desires and those deserve to be fulfilled. It made me feel full. It reminded me of my progress. In the city, I saw growth. I saw limitless opportunity and possibility. The city is an open mind. There is no fear of judgment, while you are there. It seems the main focus in the city is to dream, to create, to live fully. Coming from a small town, it was a truly enchanting otherworldly place, where I, surprisingly, felt safe. I know I will go back to the city many many times. I have been further inspired to travel, thanks to this experience. I am truly grateful to live on an earth so diverse, an earth holding new adventures around every corner I turn. I have lived in the same town for 17 years. I know what it is to be “settled down”(okay, like not with a husband, but to have a “permanent” home). But, I feel it in my bones; it is time to wander.

And, for you, I have one suggestion, maybe even a request. Go to the city. Get inspired. Listen to music. Hear your heart’s desire. Lift the veil between what is false and what is real. Admire the colors, sculptures, and art that paint the city. Fall in love with a stranger. Try something for the first time. If you’re looking for magic, the city is where you’ll find it. It helps you to see you for who you truly are. It makes you brave and daring enough, to search for more, beyond where you are coming from, beyond what you have known.

But, perhaps, you do not have to go to New York City. This earth is abundantly decorated with energetic cities and raw peaceful places. Go somewhere new. Go to a place that will give you what you need, whether it be peace and silence or energy and adventure. Trust me, you’ll find what you need. It is as easy as leaving “home”, as easy as leaving comfort.

 

And, also, I went to the Museum of Modern Art and was pretty much mesmerized by everything they had to show. I figured I would share some of what I saw, although the pictures do not do the art justice. Sounds cheesy, but you almost have to experience the art first hand to better understand and love it.

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The city showed me:

  • the kindness of strangers
  • the soul’s true desires
  • individuality
  • how much energy one place can feed
  • art, so much art
  • music without words
  • what dreams are made of
  • magic

The city taught me:

  • how much love this world has
  • how many people are in need of this love
  • that it’s okay to be on your own
  • judgments are silly and nothing to fear
  • i have a voice and it is there for a reason

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you can not be spoken

you can not be solved

you are felt deeply

you can not be hidden on the surface

you can be seen so clearly

yet sometimes you are beyond what my eyes allow me to see

you are everywhere

yet hard to find

when i look outside of me

you are the twinkle in an eye

the breath that has been stolen by the stars

you are the warmth of gentle lips

the toes that dance in the sand

you are the finger that points to the clouds

the hand that pulls the curtain back to let the sun in

you are the loudest laughter

and the tiniest giggles

you are the tongue that meets the snowflake

the hips that sway to the music

you are infinite

you are a billion analogies

and a trillion possibilities

you are love

i am love

– g.c.