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i swear i have written it down a thousand times,

“i love myself.

i am grateful.

i am worthy”,

but what truly counts are the times i say it to myself.

i only write for moments in time,

but the voice in my head is sometimes endless.

what is it saying?..

that is what truly counts.

 

self talk – g.c.

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i’ve fallen in love with change and uncertainty

a worldly experience pours into my consciousness

i allow it to flow through me

fill every aspect of my being

i am not drained

these challenges have warmed the blood in my body

and kept my heartbeat steady

each inflow and outflow of breath is another second i am alive

never asleep, never still

constant

constant movement of thoughts, emotion, fear, love

i am not held by any of these

each moment is different to the next

so this must mean i am free

i am free to change and stop resisting the fact that circumstances will never stay the same

i am free to choose

 

i’ll choose to be like a black raven beating its wings underneath the sun of the Indian summer

enduring the heat

expecting the changes of Autumn

 

change- g.c.

Acknowledge the Darkness

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you’re not alone

someone far away

or very close

is nurturing those demons tonight

who may not be as strong as you

 

or have the awareness

so know this is your gift

you are one step closer to transcendence

knowing you are truly above this will manifest in your reality and those demons will soon have vanished

which you won’t notice until the next time you go looking for them

and you’ll smile

knowing

you didn’t have to fight a battle

to have won

 

two left feet,

elephant arms swinging,

movements way off beat,

from the tippity top of tired lungs,

tortuously loud singing,

unstoppable,

music rushing like blood through her veins,

messy tendrils of golden hair are probable,

naive and displeased with life’s foolish games,

she dances,

dances to release this pain,

spinning around,

until reality can no longer be found,

shaking away worries,

until her heart can feel sound,

the song of her soul,

she calls it liberation,

it plays when she dances,

it rids life’s frustration,

moments where her world is silent are the best chances

for jubilant freedom dances

 

home alone – g.c.

i do not see those around me hungry for the truth

their stomachs are empty

but i know their hearts are not

they do not feel their hunger

but there will come a day

where they will feel the pain all at once

hear it from one loud roar

recognize it from one occurrence

seeing an event unfold

their lives unfold

and they will beg to be fed

and trust me

they will not starve

their hunger will be satiated

filled with truth

and emptied of reliance

but

until the ego’s demise

the curious child inside will go hungry

and not ask

because they do not know what it is to be fed

 

just some food for thought – g.c.

i see people who have never lived their truth

envy the youth

draw a line to divide those who have lived longer

but still wander

they are not fine

or wise

they have just grown tired                                                  of being naive

                              so to satisfy displease

they pretend that they know

this is wrong                                             that is right

do not fight

what they say

not only lies but consequences too have been made

punished for finding your truth

while you are still considered to be in your youth

you know yourself all too well                                                                too soon

its good to be lost

                    have to follow a boss

veer away from the line

don’t dare cross

thats what they say

but the fire in your belly put you here today

to stand up

not obey

and proudly say

that i am who i am

and i don’t give a damn

fuck the perfect plan

i’ll draw my path

won’t fear your wrath

i have my own

i’ll never be without a home

i’ll follow my soul

and will never be told

to sit down

or that faith can’t be found

it is all within

my story will begin

and i’ll have real tales

of wisdom

     for children who listen

                           to not just me

but stay curious                                                                      and search for more than they see

 

 

old souls in a new world – g.c.